How many times have you
been wronged in your life and desperately want revenge to even the score or to
put your mind at rest?
Countless times without
any doubt. You can’t eat or sleep because your every waking moment is consumed
with getting revenge on the person who wronged you.
Even though the Good
Book tells us to turn the other cheek and you might have mouthed ‘I forgive
you’ to the person who wronged you there’s still that burning anger within you
that will know no peace until you get your own back.
If you’ve been wronged
it’s not easy to forget until the other person is punished. Psychologically it
changes our perspective on life; we feel betrayed and find it difficult
trusting people, we question the word ‘justice’ and why it’s failed us, we want
to know why guilty people are walking around unpunished. Like a festering wound
it grows in our minds, consuming our lives until the only way out is to seek
revenge.
Revenge can sometimes
be a bitter-sweet-pill; on the one hand we derive satisfaction from getting our
own back on those who wrong us but on the other hand we risk turning into the
monsters they are. We spend so much time plotting or devising our perfect revenge
on them not realizing that by every minute we’re beginning to think like those
who wronged us in the first place. A German philosopher once said that he who
fights monsters must take care that he doesn’t become one himself. Not
forgetting what Confucius said, “..before you embark on a journey of revenge,
dig two graves..”, your revenge trip might just backfire on you!
Two wrongs do not make
a right. If you fight with a mad man on the street what are people going to
say? They will say two mad men are fighting! Likewise if someone does something
bad to you and you retaliate you become as bad as the person who wronged you in
the first place.
So let’s say you’re
still bent on revenge. You decide to strike back. Good! You’ve got your
revenge, happy now? Does it compensate you for the pain and suffering you’ve
been through or do you just pretend to yourself that it does? It doesn’t! The
pain of what that person did to you, either physically or mentally, will always
be there and no amount of revenge will get rid of it.
As
for those who are suffering from spiritual attacks, which is the preferred
weapon of choice of our people, I urge you not to reply in kind, resist the
temptation. Any misuse of spiritual powers to cast spells or do juju is evil
and demonic. It’s best to leave such diabolical practices well alone. The
divine retribution for using such evil powers or entities, regardless of the
circumstances, is often severe. In saying this I’m not saying don’t protect yourself.
Heaven helps those who help themselves. Fortify yourself with meditation,
prayer and the Light and you’ll be fine.
Sometimes, without
sounding like a coward, its best to just walk away and leave the other person
to face divine justice which has a way of punishing us for our misdeeds when we
least expect it. As the Yorubas will say – “ God didn’t put their punishment
cane in your hand”. Leave them, they’ll be dealt with. With time your wronged
heart will heal and you’ll be able to move on with your life as the better
person who didn’t seek revenge risking becoming like them.
To summarise, the
secret to the power of forgiveness is very simple – learn to forgive those who
wronged you, in your heart, and move on! It doesn’t mean you’re weak, stupid or
a coward. When you forgive somebody, unconditionally, you’re relieving yourself
of a great burden.
“….when
you look deeply you begin to understand,
the
moment when you understand, compassion is
born
in your heart, and then it is possible for you to
forgive…”
– Thich Nhat Hanh.
Very few people in the
world today have the ability to forgive someone unconditionally – Make yourself
one of them. You will be elevated to a state of grace that is neither pretence
or forced. If someone can forgive those who strung him up on a cross why can’t
you?
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